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PURCHASE THE DIGITAL COLLECTION (2013)
Colonel Tom Parker (b. Andreas van Kuijk)
B. 6.25.09 Breda, Netherlands / D. 1.21.97 Las Vegas
I’m sorry to say it’s going to take closer to 4 billion dollars a month to keep me writing this site.
I know I quoted you 2 billion originally.
As I said, I’m sorry.
I’m just sorry.
But every time I sit down at the computer to work I’m surrounded by Arabs demanding I share my electricity.
Arab children, melted ice cream pooling in their cupped hands—don’t they know they have to eat it faster?
Gasoline-eyed Arab women I’m not supposed to look back at—oh no not too distracting.
Slaves, former slaves, descendants of slaves, also-rans—whatever their relationship to the institution, they’re all over me too.
By the way, the 36% of all Hispanic boys in the New York City public school system who are also obese live in bunkbeds next to my desk now.
And the Antichrist won’t stop moping in the corner about how Lisa-Marie Presley has stolen his gig.
Like the millennium was my responsibility.
Blood rain blood rain blood rain—this isn’t letting up any time soon.
Consolation Site: ”My Attraction”
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