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2001-04-11
What am I listening to? Bobbie Gentry, Ode to Billie Joe.
Napster? Yes. But I owned the single as a child, so it�s okay.
What am I cooking? Meatloaf and new potatoes.
What did I do just a few minutes ago? Took out all the entries I put in my profile the other night and left it empty again.
What did I list as three of my favorite bands? The Liver Kings, Too Short for That Gesture, Bitter Teat.
What is my problem? I hardly ever recognize any of the bands on those lists, except from other lists. I am old.
How old? Jodie Foster�s age.
Do I believe that Jodie Foster lies about her age? Yes.
What did I list as my favorite movies? I so hate this question. I always forget "Nashville."
Does "liking" Sarah Polley make me a pedophile? No.
Even though she's only about four feet tall? Yes. I mean no. I mean yes.
Whom did I list my favorite authors? At first, all I put was Shakespeare; it struck me as funny. Then I clicked on the link and discovered the enormous list of people who�d also put Shakespeare. I thought, OH THAT'S what these profiles are for! I just use them to help me avoid �Virgin Suicides� fans.
Have I read or seen �The Virgin Suicides�? No.
But I think I have a right to judge its admirers? Well I mean if it makes you feel any better I don�t think it�s nearly as bad as admiring �The Vagina Monologues.�
Have I read or seen �The Vagina Monologues� either? No, I�m waiting to see it on my first visit to Disneyworld.
Why is Charles Dickens my favorite writer? Because of one night in 1989, when I dived under my blankets and read several pages of "Our Mutual Friend" by flashlight because I was staying at Lake Attitlan in Guatemala, and a long parade of marching military boots had just gone past my frail hotel room door�because eventually I even slept well.
How was the meatloaf? Delicious�as always!
What am I most likely to do when it occurs to me that I am an inspired genuis? Dance around the kitchen.
Is it possible that I could ever grow tired of listening to Evelyn "Champagne" King's disco classic "Shame"? No. Never.